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10 Off My Head: Siri Says 1989

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Well it's Tuesday so you know what that means - there's about a 20-25% chance that I won't be lazy and I will actually do one of our "Siri Says" series posts, wherein I ask the robot lady inside my telephone to give me a random number between one and one hundred and then, once she has, I take that number and I turn it into a year and then I pick my five (well usually five) favorite movies from that year. For example today my phone gave me the number 89, and so we're going to list out favorite movies from The Movies of 1989.

On first glance through 1989's movies I thought this was going to be a small sad strange bunch, since the year was mostly populated with junk like Weekend at Bernie's or Born on the Fourth of July or (horror of horrors) Driving Miss Daisy. Blecch no thank you - I am with Spike Lee; Morgan Freeman should have driven Miss Daisy right off the cliff. But then I started digging deeper and there are a bunch of buried gems that came out this year, and what follows is probably one of the strangest most erratic batch of movies I've ever listed for one of these.

There are movies in here that I loved as a 11-year-old kid and there are movies that I have come to appreciate with a more adult sensibility, but side by side these all seem a little bit bonkers. Anyway once I did get to digging I found plenty to adore - indeed too many, and this week's list is twice the standard. And I could've made it even longer and brought several of those runners-up up too - Indiana Jones and Batman should've made my top list probably, but I decided to just stay weirder.

And before you write an angry defense of Do the Right Thing (obviously the true masterpiece of the year) please remember these aren't the "best" movies of the year, they are the ones I personally get the most joy from. My "favorites." My "best" list would be pretty different. (There are also some real glaring oversights in the list of movies I haven't seen, for that matter.) I give you...

My 10 Favorite Movies of 1989

(dir. Ron Clements & John Musker)
-- released on November 17th 1989 --

(dir. Rowdy Herrington)
-- released on May 19th 1989 --

(dir. Michael Lehmann)
-- released on March 31st 1989 --

(dir. Phillip Noyce)
-- released on April 7th 1989 --

(dir. Herbert Ross)
-- released on November 22nd 1989 --

(dir. Peter Jackson)
-- released on December 8th 1989 --

(dir. Martin Donovan)
-- released on October 18th 1989 --

(dir. Michael Haneke)
-- released on May 19th 1989 --

(dir. Danny Devito)
-- released on 1989 --

(dir. Brian Yuzna)
-- released on May 13th 1989 --

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Runners-up: Batman (dir. Tim Burton), Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (dir. Spielberg), Do the Right Thing (dir. Spike Lee), Sante Sangre (dir. Jodorowsky), Back to the Future: Part II (dir. Zemeckis), Parenthood (dir. Ron Howard), Drugstore Cowboy (dir. Gus Van Sant), The Abyss (dir. James Cameron), Troop Beverly Hills (dir. Jeff Kanew)....

.... Ghostbusters II (dir. Ivan Reitman), The Adventures of Baron Munchausen (dir. Gilliam), The Fabulous Baker Boys (dir. Steve Kloves), Akira (dir. Otomo),Crimes + Misdemeanors (dir. Woody Allen), Parents (dir. Bob Balaban), Major League (dir. Irby Smith), When Harry Met Sally (dir. Rob Reiner), Sex Lies and Videotape (dir. Steven Soderbergh), The Burbs (dir. Joe Dante)

Never seen: Casualties of War (dir. Brian De Palma), My Left Foot (dir. Jim Sheridan), Roger & Me (dir. Michael Moore), The Cook, the Thief, His Wife and Her Lover (dir. Peter Greenaway), Dekalog (dir. Kieslowski)...

... Kiki's Delivery Service (dir. Miyazaki), The Killer (dir. John Woo), Last Exit to Brooklyn (dir. Uli Edel), New York Stories (dir. Various), The Rainbow (dir. Ken Russell), Sweetie (dir. Jane Campion), Valmont (dir. Milos Forman)

What are your favorite movies of 1989?
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Charlie Hunnam Goes To Prison

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The first trailer and a whole bunch of still pictures for the remake of Papillon starring Charlie Hunnam and Rami Malek has arrived and trailer-wise it is already living up to my lofty ideas of what a "Charlie Hunnam Prison Movie" could be. 

Okay they're not exactly "lofty" per se. But they're uh, there! And they are being met, and for that I am appreciative. And then some...

Honestly I'm a little bit surprised by how many of the boxes the trailer checks that I was hoping for - Charlie is arrested naked, gets stripped and hosed down at prison, appears to have a naked shower fight with surly inmates, and cuddles with Rami Malek in bed!

It appears I might have blacked out and had an episode where I went and directed this movie while unconscious? That seems as likely as anything. Anyway here's the trailer:
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Papillon is out on August 24th.
Hit the jump for a whole bunch more pictures...





























Great Moments In Movie Shelves #151

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I've been to Toronto a dozen times in my life, having grown up just across the lake, but I'm not enough of a local to've known that Queen Video was a real place and not just an easter egg put across from Jake Gyllenhaal to make me snicker.

Unfortunately Queen Video closed in 2016, so if you're planning on visiting it for your super duper Enemy Movie Location Tour the next time you're in town you'll have to cross that one off the list.

It's probably safe to assume at this point, whether you liked Blade Runner 2049 or not (I did not) that Denis Villeneuve has got a long career still ahead of him - next up is two Dune movies, apparently! - but I often find myself wondering where Enemy will fall when the dust settles on his career. My opinion's that it's his best movie to date but then as we all know...

... my opinion's mostly garbage. Anyway this is kind of a throwaway scene in the film; Jake's professor character has just been told by a co-worker in a very odd scene (even for this movie) that he should go watch a movie - nothing is stranger here than friendly conversation! - and so he goes and rents a movie. And suddenly...

... there he is.
I love how the movie inside the movie...

... actually looks less stylized than
 the, uh, movie outside the movie as if
Jake's trapped in dual purgatories. (And isn't he?)


RIP Clint Walker

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Clint Walker has died at age 90, you guys! Honestly every time I posted about Clint I was pretty surprised he was still kicking around, but it's not like he didn't prove his entire career that he was the bearer of some of the sturdiest goddamned genes ever put on-screen. The actor, who was in the words of someone who'd know (i.e. me) The Ultimate Beefcake (aka The Greatest Beef That Ever Caked) was mainly known for playing lots of cowboy and soldier roles in the 50s and 60s, because duh.

He got his big break when Cecil B. DeMille cast him in The Ten Commandments but his role got shrunk down to a cameo because all 6'6" of him made Charlton Heston and Yul Brynner look like little people and you couldn't have that. You can glimpse him in this clip below walking behind Yul - he's the BIG GUY in the viking helmet:
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He fared better on TV, doing seven seasons of the western Cheyenne, but my favorite thing of his is the Rock Hudson Doris Day movie Send Me No Flowers in which he was hired specifically to make the big strapping Rock Hudson look puny. And he did!

Anyway y'all can scroll through our Clint Walker Archives if you like (I recommend you do!) but let's honor Clint's legacy with a few dozen pictures I just now gathered up that I've somehow not posted before right here after the jump...

























Good Morning, World

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Is anybody else unconvinced that that was actually James Marsden's actual butt on this week's latest episode of Westworld Adventure Time? James hasn't shown a lot of skin in the past (I still think some of his nudity in the Death at the Funeral movie was faked) and this is shot like doubles were used. Here I will show you what I am talking about:

That is a lovely butt but the way that's shot that could be anybody's butt. That could be my butt - maybe I did butt-double duty for Jimmy during the same period when I blacked out and directed a prison movie starring Charlie Hunnam? Jeez what else am I going to find out I did whilst out of it? If a remake of Boys in the Sandstarring Jake Gyllenhaal and Jai Courtney suddenly presents itself I think we'll have our answer. Until then I ask you...

Five Frames From ?

I'm Into Girl Stuff

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I'm no good at box office stuff but I think Disobedience making two million bucks is decent, isn't it? I mean these days when people only go to the theater to see Sebastian Stan make moon-eyes at Chris Evans in spandex fetish costumes, at least. The little Lesbian Orthodox Jew romance did pretty good. Anyway two million bucks, good or not, still means a ton of y'all did not see the film in theaters so mark July 17th in your calendars - that's when it's hitting blu-ray. Go pre-order your copy now - it's only the best movie of the year so far, says me. (Here's my review.) All that plus you get to repeatedly picture what it would be like to run your fingers through Alessandro Nivola's beard - it's a win for everyone!


My Lonely Days Are Over

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Wow wow wow the teaser trailer for Paul Dano's film Wildlife starring Jake Gyllenhaal and Carey Mulligan is here and... wow wow wow. This movie can't get here quick enough. It's giving me some serious Revolutionary Road vibes which are vibes I am super into since I love Revolutionary Road and the thought of a Revolutionary Road starring Jake & Carey is like catnip rubbed like seasoning across the surface of my brains. Watch:
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Not sure if we had the official release date yet either -
Wildlife is hitting theaters on October 19th, which seems good;
it's not quite crammed into the holiday bulk. It can breathe.

The film mostly got stellar reviews when it premiered at Sundance a couple of months ago, so fingers crossed. There are a couple of shots of Carey in there that brought tears to my eyes almost immediately, and then there's this shot of Jake...



So I Saw Hereditary...

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I've been crowing about my desperation to see Hereditary, the forthcoming horror film starring Toni Collette, ever since it premiered to big raves at Sundance. And if you follow me on Twitter (see below) or Instagram (also see below) then you know I finally saw the movie this past weekend. So why haven't I said anything about it here yet, or written the review that my tweet promised?
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Thing is, I've decided to wait until I see it a second time to review it. Which isn't that long a wait - I am seeing it a second time next week. The film isn't out until June 8th anyway - when I do write up the movie I don't foresee being able to talk about it without spoilers, and you don't want to go into this movie spoiled. Don't watch the trailers, you guys! Cover your eyes and ears. Go in fresh as you can. And when the time comes believe me I will have a lot to say. A LOT.
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For now I will just remind you that if you haven't yet you need to watch director Ari Aster's short film The Strange Thing About the Johnsons, which isn't thematically linked to Hereditary or anything but will show you the kind of fucked-up-ed-ness that Ari seems to like trafficking in. It's best to prepare yourself, folks. Plus this thing's just great in itself, watch:
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Alex Pettyfer One Time

Unlucky Lucas

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EW has shared the first three images (along with some chat too) from Boy Erased, Joel Edgerton's new movie (his second feature directing gig following 2015's very fine thriller The Gift) about gay conversion therapy starring Lucas Hedges as the gay boy with Nicole Kidman and Russell Crowe as his parents...

... who ship him off to get the gay zapped out of him. Oh and Edgerton himself is playing the pastor who heads the camp (see him below). See our previous posts about this movie right here; it's out on September 28th and also stars Xavier Dolan, Cherry Jones, and Troye Sivan, among others. That's one big gay bunch.


God's Own Prince Charles

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So tell me again - do you guys watch The Crown? I do not but I've been tempted - the boyfriend quite uncharacteristically started watching it several months ago and got (dare I say) royally hooked, which convinced me that maybe I ought to give it a try. That was followed up by two more vague urgings via vague happenstance - I thought Claire Foy was splendid in Steven Soderbergh's Unsane, which marked the first time I saw her in anything, and number two (which I've posted about previously) I found out that Matthew Goode was having bisexual threesomes on the show. I should be watching this show already dammit. 

Anyway more prodding comes via this week's news that the next season of the show will feature God's Own Country star the marvelous Josh O'Connor - he's playing young Prince Charles! Ha, Prince Charles wishes. This is so nice to Prince Charles. Oh and apparently Olivia Colman is on the show now too? That's it! I'm starting it over the long weekend. And I will maybe watch God's Own Country again while I am at it...


Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

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... you can learn from:


Giuseppe Baldini: Now pay attention to what I tell you. Just like a musical chord, a perfume chord contains four essences, or notes, carefully selected for their harmonic affinity. Each perfume contains three chords: the head, the heart and the base, necessitating 12 notes in all. The head chord contains the first impression, lasting a few minutes before giving way to the heart chord, the theme of the perfume, lasting several hours. Finally, the base chord, the trail of the perfume lasting several days.
Mind you, the Egyptians believed that one can only create a truly original perfume by adding an extra note, one final essence that will ring out and dominate the others. Legend had it that an amphora was once found in a pharaoh's tomb, and when it was opened, a perfume was released, after all those thousands of years, a perfume of such subtle beauty, and yet such power, that for one single moment every person on earth believed they were in paradise. 12 essences could be identified, but the 13th, the vital one, could never be determined.

A happy 53rd birthday to Tom Tykwer today!


Me & CMBYN Turn 2

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This is sort of a goofy anniversary to mark but it was two years ago today - May 23rd 2016 - when I wrote my very first post here on the site about Call Me By Your Name. And I know I've beaten this drum before but I was there reporting on this movie before anybody else - two years ago this was not big news. The book was known in certain circles but no blockbuster, while Luca Guadagnino's previous film A Bigger Splash had only just come out a couple weeks previously - it was well-received but people weren't exactly scouring the trades for news of his next project. I think it was several weeks later when I first saw CMBYN officially reported in the trades.

And Armie was just starting his turn to indie fare thanks to that well-documented string of blockbuster flops he did - The Birth of a Nation was still riding buzz from its Sundance premiere (before that cratered) but nobody was really writing about him when they wrote about that movie anyway. And Timothée Chalamet... who?? Timo what now? Exactly.

When I wrote about the film that day they were still in the process of filming it - I managed to dig up a couple of photos from the set that will look familiar to any of us who eventually became obsessed, but at the time I had to do some heavy digging to find this stuff. Point being... I am sure glad I did! It worked out well for me! Check out all of our extensive (there really isn't a word for that gets across how extensive I actually mean so we'll have to stick with just 'extensive") coverage on the movie at this link here. For a more curated bunch of links click here. Now bring on the sequel!


The Misandrists in 250 Words or Less

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A good title for a review of Bruce La Bruce's new movie The Misandrists would definitely be "¡Vulva la Revolución!" -- and if anybody wants to steal that I offer it freely, in the spirit of the film's brutal anti-capitalist streak. So what do I say about The Misandrists? Have you seen a Bruce La Bruce movie before? Not the last one of his that I reviewed here, the one called Gerontophilia, though - that one sticks out among his work like Mysterious Skin sort of sticks out among Gregg Araki's work, in that those ones managed to twist their makers revolutionary weirdness into more mainstream packaging for a hot minute.

Araki was back to his old tricks soon enough with the likes of Kaboom and here The Misandrists feels like vintage Bruce La Bruce again, mixing up pornography and violence with art-school screeching - I say "screeching" with love in my heart, I truly do. Who else would make a movie about a cult of lesbian terrorists posing as a Catholic School reformatory, splicing actual footage of gender reassignment surgery in between gauzily shot pillow fight trysts? The world is richer and stranger with Bruce making these things in it - cherish every frame or, to borrow a phrase from the Pope of Filth himself, go fuck yourself.
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The Misandrists is opening here in NYC this weekend and you can actually see Bruce and some of the film's cast for a Q&A at a couple of screenings... which as a concept is hysterically funny once you've seen the film's fourth-wall-busting final scene; believe you me. I can only imagine that experience. Go do it and report back to me...
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Say Hi To Big Ben

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We have our Ben! Kiwi actor Jay Ryan - who's been on a ton of TV shows over the past two decades (his first two roles were on Young Hercules and Xena!) but most recently has been seen on Top of the Lake and Mary Kills People - has just signed on to play the character of grown-up "Ben Hanscom" in the second It movie. 

We had been hoping that Jerry O'Connell, who went and got all shredded after famously playing the "chubby kid" in another Stephen King adaptation called Stand By Me, might land the role because that would've been fun (and I would've been able to title this post "Ben and Jerry") but that was not to be. Oh well, I don't hold it against Jay Ryan here though, because...

... I'm too busy wanting to hold other things against him. Ahem. Anyway all of the kids in the "Losers Club" have now been cast except for "Mike Hanlon." I wonder what's taking them so long to cast Mike? You got something better to do, David Oyelowo? In summation here is another gif of Jay Ryan without his shirt on:


Unhinge Your Claws

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The trailer for the second season of my beloved Claws is here and I'm real excited of course but the above is one of the few glimpses we get of my boyfriend Roller (Jack Kesy forever) in the whole trailer and suddenly I can't for the life of me remember how the first season ended and where we left him?

There were so many fake-outs and plot turns that my memory's foggy. Oh well I have the first season on DVD so I guess I'll just have to re-watch the whole damned delightful thing! What fun! Anyway joining the show for the second season is the incredible Franke "Run Lola Run" Potente of all people, and looking like...

This show is a damn marvel. Watch:
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Claws is back on June 10th on TNT. 
May it live long and prosper muchly.
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This Is Your Quasimodo Now

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Oh my god, he's hideous! Look away look away! Children spill into the streets in fright and old men's hearts go tick tick boom from the unadulterated horror of this nightmare turned flesh, et cetera, et cetera. Or not, but I guess they're gonna try - Idris Elba has just signed on to direct and yes indeed star in a "modern retelling" of Victor Hugo's The Hunchback of Notre Dame for Netflix. I imagine there will be make-up involved in this process, but this is still an awful lot to burden make-up with - the most famous versions of this story starred Lon Chaney Sr. and Charles Laughton...

... neither of whom were really ever setting hearts a'flutter in the first place. But hey - stretch those (acting) muscles, Idris, by all means. This will mark Idris' second stab at directing - his film Yardie played at Sundance earlier this year.


Pics of the Day

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According to JJ (where these pictures are from) they've just now finished shooting Triple Frontier, the movie gift that has kept giving pictures of Charlie Hunnam & Garrett Hedlund & Oscar Isaac & Pedro Pascal (oh and also Ben Affleck's unfortunate tattoo) half-naked in Hawaii. Click here to see our many, many posts! But the dude on the right up top is certainly not Pedro, as he's labeled over there - any idea who it is? - so maybe JJ is wrong about everything and they'll just go on shooting Triple Frontier forever and ever. That's my hope anyway, but I doubt you disagree. (They could at least get a little more naked if this is their last day, anyway.)


Good Morning, World

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A happy 40th birthday to Bryan Greenberg today - this shot is off his Instagram a couple of months ago but if you look at his more recent pictures you'll find he has a wonderfully luxurious ginger beard right now. What better way to celebrate forty than by committing to the Viking look unabashedly, I say? I hope his friends put "You're Going to Pillage the Hell Out of Your 40s!" on his cake.
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