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Hey Look It's the Barbie Poster

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That sure is the Barbie poster! Greta Gerwig's Barbie movie, which is a thing, is hitting theaters on July 21st. There are also an enormous pile of character posters floating around as well and you can see them here but come on, this is all we care about: 



Donald Glover Thirteen Times

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Donald Glover is the cover-boy of GQ this month and he's looking mighty fine in the full spread photographed by Fanny Latour-Lambert -- lots of oranges, giving me a citrus-ier Call Me By Your Name vibe. (Editor's note: I do not recommend sticking one's penis into an orange though. It burns!) Anyway I haven't read the interview yet but I assume he's talking about his series Swarm that he created starring Dominique Fishback as a deranged pseudo-Beyoncé fan on a murder-spree -- I still haven't gotten around to watching Atlanta but I'm currently watching Swarm and it has me ten thousand percent enthralled. I def recommend. Fishback was the standout in Judas and the Black Messiah in my humble opinion and it's awesome to see her get a big juicy role like this. But speaking of juicy, though -- Donald Glover in some really tight pants, as he is for the majority of this photoshoot. Hit the jump for all of the photos...













Quote of the Day

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"The animal people said, “Would you mind taking the snake [that Lena holds in scenes] home?” I was asked to keep the snake so it would get used to me. It was a corn snake. The idea was that I would take the snake home, have it on my vast bed the size of a football pitch, and it would sleep down there in a bag. It began to cough up these fur balls. It was quite disgusting. I don’t think it got to know me very well because it did bite me. The whole thing was slightly Wild West-ish, I have to say. Think of the snake — the snake shouldn’t have to go and spend the night in an actor’s house."

I saw a press screening of the new animated Super Mario Brothers movie last evening and when I got home I felt compelled to watch the 1993 version, which I had not laid a single solitary eyeball upon since it was released in 1993 and uhh holy shit y'all. Super Mario Bros 1993 is... a movie. Where else are you gonna see eternal scene-stealer Fiona Shaw in purple latex and a beehive whooping it up with Dennis fuckin' Hopper? (Beside my wet dreams, of course.) Anyway that's Fiona speaking above via the just dropped oral history of the 1993 movie at Inverse, read the whole damn thing right here. That movie is just wholly inexplicable in ways I don't think any of us will ever comprehend, but this gives an adequate start. Maybe if you smoke some crack cocaine and read it things will make a little more sense. Who can say? Here's the trailer of the new movie, which comparatively is about one billion percent more what one would expect out of a Super Mario movie:


Today's Fanboy Delusion

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Today I'd rather be...

... taking a ride on that wood
with Pablo Schreiber. (via)


Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

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... you can learn from:

Ennis: If you can't fix it, Jack, you gotta stand it.

Today would've been Heath Ledger's 44th birthday.
What a loss. Click here for a good piece on his legacy.

Happy 10 to Hannibal

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I think about Bryan Fuller's Hannibal every night before I go to bed and every morning when I wake up because I have Kevin Tong's Mondo poster (RIP Mondo) for the show seen above (signed by the whole cast!) hanging above my bed. I was thinking about the show on my way to work this morning! And yet it didn't strike me until I just saw it on Twitter this afternoon that today is the 10th anniversary of the premiere of the show??? That's literally insane. Certifiably insane. Impossible cannibal-levels of insane! I can't believe it's been an entire decade. If you weren't here reading the site ten years ago then you probably don't know that the only set visit I've ever done was visiting the set of the pilot of Hannibal -- one of my most cherished memories, that.

I've been dying to do a re-watch of the series but time to "watch things" that aren't work has become so scarce these days -- that said the whole damn thing is on Hulu if you're so inclined, or if I am so inclined once I have the time. There are so many images burned deep into the tasty, tasty meat of my brains that I want to re-visit. I remember being in awe of what Bryan was getting away with on network television every single week. Soon enough we'll get to see what he'll get away with for his Friday the 13th series, which should be something indeed, but until then I'll just wish this brilliant perfect series a happy birthday and then ask the eternal question...

Pic of the Day

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Hey look it's the hot boys of Nosferatu! Not sure who the dude in the Navy cap is but working right to left that Nicky Hoult, Aaron Taylor-Johnson, and the Skarsgards Bill and Gustaf -- now shooting of course is Robert Eggers'Nosferatu re-do starring all of them but Gustaf (as far as we know - he isn't listed on the cast list right now anyway). Bill is the vampire of course, because of course he is. While Nicky is probably the Harker role and who knows about Aaron. Personally I'm hoping he's one of their butt boys. Come on, Robert! You owe us after not a single one of the Vikings diddled each other in The Northman. Anyway if we zoom in on the photo I have got to ask...

... Do, Dump or Marry?

Good Morning, World

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Sorry to everyone else but I'm sure you get it --
good morning only to Michiel Huisman. 



Five Frames From ?

This Cast is Rated X For Exxxtremely Awesome

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As you can see at the bottom of this post A24 put out a new little teaser for Ti West's MaXXXine today -- that would be the third film in trilogy that's so far gifted us with X and Pearl, as originally teased at the end credits of the latter -- and really all it lets us know is the cast. But the cast! THE CAST!!! Besides Mia Goth -- which let's be clear, Mia is enough on her own to buy a ticket -- this one will co-star Elizabeth f'ing Debicki, the musicians Moses Sumney and Halsey, Michelle Monaghan, Bobby Cannavale, Lily Collins, Giancarlo Espisito, and Kevin f'ing Bacon as the Friday the 13th Slasher-O.G. in residence. We're still only getting a "Coming Soon" when it comes to dating this hunka burnin love but let's hope it's sooner rather than never. Debicki! 

Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

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... you can learn from::

What Ever Happened to Baby Jane? (1962)

Jane: You know, we're right back where we started.
When I was on the stage you had to depend on me
for everything. Even the food you ate came from me.
Now you have to depend on me for your food again.
So, you see, we're right back where we started.
Blanche: Why are you doing this to me? Why?
Jane: Doing what?
Blanche: Making me afraid to eat.
Trying to make me starve myself.
Jane: Don't be silly. If you starve you die.
Bette Davis was born 115 years ago today! I was going to call her 'the legend Bette Davis" but "legend" doesn't even seem adequate for Bette fucking Davis, ya know? She's so beyond mere "legend." Bette Davis has truly ascended into the heavens and stands beside Zeus and Mickey Mouse. Anyway in a very strange coincidence I got myself a brand new Bette Davis poster in the mail this very morning! Do y'all know the artist who goes by ElvisDead? This is their website here -- I became obsessed with their movie-poster work thanks to their truly terrifying Night of the Living Dead poster (see that here), and so the second it was on sale I snatched up a copy of the Baby Jane poster, which I will now share with you:

Fucking killer right? I am obsessed. I unwrapped that beauty from the tube before coming to work this morning and it's even better in person. It looks like she's reaching right for you! That bitch is going right over my bed! Happy birthday, Bette!


Ryan Gosling Six Times

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I shared the new Barbie poster with you yesterday but not the latest trailer, so here -- you can watch the trailer right here. I haven't watched it myself, as I'm saving my mind and body and spirit for July 21st when it hits theaters (or whenever they schedule the press screening before that, more likely). But I have seen enough memes going around to get the poppy gist! Anyway these new photos of Ryan here (via) feel like they're bridging the gap between Ken and The Driver from Drive sort of right? Like The Driver got the beach-swept special at the salon in between hit jobs. And if that doesn't make you hit the jump nothing will...






Here is the Beef

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Have you heard about Beef, Steven Yeun's new series on Netflix? Here is the trailer for it -- it also stars comedian Ali Wong and a bunch of other hot pieces in a tale of road rage most epic, and it's hitting Netflix tomorrow. Tomorrow I said! Well I binged the entire thing a couple of weeks ago and have written up some thoughts on it for Pajiba today, click here to read them. But really the most important piece of information is contained in this tweet:

Good Morning, World

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I wish I had some more outtakes (or intakes) of Miguel Angel Silvestre posing in his birthday suit for Esquire Spain here on the celebratory occasion of his 41st birthday. But all I have is a video of him doing lots of squats in short-shorts. Poor us! How will we properly celebrate if we're not zooming in three hundred percent so we're staring directly at his shaft? I suppose we'll deal. That's our present to you, Miguel. You can wear shorts this birthday. But don't go getting any fancy ideas!

Five Frames From ?


Steven Yeun's Butt Says Hi

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When I mentioned yesterday that Steven Yeun shows his butt in his new Netflix limited-series Beef (out today!) I didn't say it was the five-minutes-long full-moon view we'd all be hoping for -- that above is all we get. But hey baby steps! Since this is to my knowledge his first on-screen nudity let's just be encouraging! And next somebody can cast him in a sexy erotic thriller a la Lust Caution chock-full of nudity. Anyway if you missed it I reviewed Beef over at Pajiba -- I plowed through all ten episodes in one afternoon and it is a riveting funny and anxiety-inducing watch. Very much recommended. 

Adam Brody Eleven Times

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I totally forgot that Adam Brody was even in the Shazam movies -- all the better for him, I'd say! That franchise's collapse won't drag him down like it might star Zachary Levi (and that Libertarian anti-vaxx a-hole can ride himself right off into the sunset for all I care). I forgot Adam was in the Shazam movies that is until I saw exactly that mentioned in the interview at Inverse that accompanies these extremely handsome photos of Adam. Our O.C. boy is now fully an O.C. man, and he's wearing it well. Hit the jumpfor all the snaps...









Get Ready To Get Wounded

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I was extremely sad when I missed this when it played some theaters a few months ago, so consider me ebullient -- yes, ebullient! -- to see the news that our friends at Altered Innocence are putting their 4K restoration of the pioneering 1983 queer cinema classic The Wounded Man (aka L'homme blessé) from Patrice Chéreau, the French director of Queen Margot and Intimacy, onto blu-ray and DVD on May 23rd. Vinegar Syndrome is where you can grab a copy; here is the plot synopsis:

"Henri is a frustrated teenager living with his parents in a provincial French coastal town. When they drag him to the train station to bid adieu to his sister, Henri sneaks off to a secluded bathroom and interrupts a hustler named Jean satisfying the masochistic desires of an older male client. Henri falls desperately in love with the sexy criminal, but Jean evades Henri’s affections. Undeterred, Henri shadows Jean as he traverses the dark and dangerous underbelly of their sleepy village. But as he descends deeper and deeper into Jean’s world, there may not be an easy way out. Patrice Chéreau’s 1983 drama is a revelation: an amazingly accomplished work that genuinely channels the transgressive, unsanitized sensibility of Jean Genet, boasting a breakout lead performance by young Jean-Hugues Anglade and a script that took co-writers Chéreau and legendary gay French author and activist Hervé Guibert six years to perfect. The result is a rich, strange, and sumptuous film leading us to exhilaratingly mysterious and unfamiliar spaces both physical and psychological."

And here is the trailer:


I've wanted to see this for ages and so I snagged myself a copy the second they went up for sale -- I'll surely report back when I've been able to see the film. Anyone seen it before? '80s French boys with longish hair in jeans and white t-shirts shoving tongues down each other's throats -- be still my heart. (And that's just getting started.) Anyway they were kind enough to send me some photos from the movie to get us in the mood further, and I'll share after the jump...








Good Morning, World

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Why milk just one post out of Beef (now there's a phrase) when I can milk two! Also showing some butt on the new Netflix series (which I reviewed here) besides Steven Yeun (which I posted here) is Young Mazino, who plays Yeun's brother. I love milking brothers!

Home Alone In Hell Comes Home

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Excellent news for you, for me, for everybody this morning, in that we've got blu-ray news on the nightmare-inducing no-budget-sensation horror flick Skinamarink which stirred some pots earlier this year -- Shudder is dropping it onto physical media on June 20th! Right in the thick of Pride Month - like The Babadook before it we've got a brand new inexplicable gay horror icon, the Skinamarink! I mean (unlike The Babadook) Skinamarink was made by a gay director, Kyle Edward Ball, at least. But there's nothing super specifically queer about the story, unless you wanna go full Cinema Studies Major on the symbolism of a family broken apart by a little boy's "fall"... okay I think I'm reaching.

Anyway I'm spouting more nonsense than usual right now because I'm giddy about the blu-ray itself, as seen above -- it features my very first blu-ray cover blurb! Taken from my Pajiba review (which you can read here) that's my name and my quote featured! All of that was also on the poster and the trailer (both seen here) but I'm feeling extra-special today because the three quotes from the poster got winnowed down to me and me alone! My ego, y'all -- I'm about to be unbearable. (Cut to ten people I know side-eyeing that "about to be.") Anyway I absolutely love this movie and am more than happy to be as big a cheerleader for it as I can. In all seriousness I really figured they'd upgrade to one of the good reviews the film got from the New York Times or something -- David Erlich's "Home Alone in Hell" at IndieWire was really fuckin' choice. So I'm humbled and honored and now going to stop making this about me right this second -- go pre-order Skinamarink right here. I don't know if you've heard but it will let loose absolute terror!


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