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Does The Butt Makes The Shorts Or

May 9, 2017, 3:00 pm
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There are two things that need to be said about these pictures of Kit Harington hanging by the pool in Greece. Number one - I really fucking love those swim trunks. I really fucking want those swim trunks. He doesn't even necessarily need to be wearing them at the time - in fact he could take them off and hand deliver them to me. (No I didn't say you could put something else on while you do that, Kit.) Number two...

... Kit has been working out his butt. You might not see it, but I see it, and you should trust me. I am a connoisseur of such things. Anyway this gives me hope that the next season of A Game of Thrones will finally get Jon Snow out of the cold, out of those furs, and be on full display as he fully belongs. (Blooper reels notwithstanding.)

I mean when I saw the first batch of these pictures I wasn't even planning on posting them because yes we know Kit looks good shirtless by a pool and yes I love those shorts but they weren't totally grabbing me. Then I saw the above fully-clothed but butt-centric pictures, and I was... grabbing him. With my eyes, at least. Yadda yadda yadda hit the jump for another dozen or so...








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Good Morning, Gratuitous Tom Bateman

May 10, 2017, 7:57 am
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The actor Tom Bateman is about to get a lot of exposure, and I don't just mean in the naked picture immediately below. He plays "The Guy" in Snatched, the Amy Schumer & Goldie Hawn comedy out this weekend, which is where he grabbed my attention. (More to come on that movie later this week.) But he's also one of the train folk in the upcoming Murder on the Orient Express remake, and he's co-starring in that Liam Neeson & Laura Dern thriller we told you about recently. 

Only back when I told you about it I had no idea who "Tom Bateman" was and now I do. Do I ever. Tom didn't just apparate overnight into our lives -- you might even know who he is and I'm the one slow on the uptake. He's starred in a few series - he played a Medici in that Da Vinci's Demons show and he was Jekyl himself on the recent Jekyll & Hyde show in the UK. (Right he's British, I didn't mention that. His accent in Snatched is a swooner.) 

So I think we should all prepare ourselves to stare at Tom a bunch over the next few years, is my point. And what better way to start that off then to hit the jump for a few dozen more pictures...






















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Five Frames From ?

May 10, 2017, 8:37 am
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What Movie Should They Remake Together?

May 10, 2017, 8:46 am
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I'd watch their remake of The Grifters.


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Charlie Hunnam Three Times

May 10, 2017, 9:12 am
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There's also an interview attached to these pictures - for the New York Times, no less! I realize Charlie's been at this acting thing for a very long time (I've been there since the start, remember) and starring in great big movies but a one-on-one chat with the NYT still somehow feels kinda "ooh la la he fancy now." (thx Mac)

The reviews for King Arthur that I've so far skimmed have all been pretty bad, and every single time I mention I want to see the movie somebody leaves a comment saying how dumb the movie looks, but I don't care - I think it looks fun. I'm going! Fuck you all!


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Great Moment in Movie Shelves #106

May 10, 2017, 12:02 pm
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The trailer for American Assassin came out nearly a month ago and I'm sure any of you Teen Wolf fans got your Dylan O'Brien fix from it then, but I only just now got around to watching it myself and why didn't any of you tell me he had a great big bushy beard and worked out shirtless in front of bookcases in it???

I would've watched the dumb thing a month ago if I'd have known that. It looks pretty cheesy, but not as cheesy as that action movie they made starring Taylor Lautner, so who knows. It's got a decent cast - Michael Keaton, Sanaa Lathan, and Taylor Kitsch...

... all co-star. Watch for yourselves 
if you missed it or whatever:
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Thom Yorke is a Witch

May 10, 2017, 12:27 pm
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I've been saving that picture of Thom Yorke for the right time and since Thom still has yet to interrupt one of the many many Radiohead concerts that I've been to to propose marriage to me I guess this will have to do... but it does. IT DOES. I'll give announcement duties to our pal Jarett since he's the one who alerted me to the news:
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There's a little more info on the news at Variety, which broke the story. (Although Guadagnino is quoted he doesn't admit that he's doing this because he loves MNPP and wants to make me happy, but I think we all know what's going on here.) Anyway this is the first feature film that Thom will have scored - he did music for a documentary in 2015 called Offshore Incorporated, following his Radiohead partner Jonny Greenwood's massive success in the movie biz scoring all the Paul Thomas Anderson joints.

The original score for Dario Argento's 1977 film Suspiriaby the band Goblin is one of the great movie scores of all time, horror or not horror, and so it's smart of Guadagnino to go big. I wonder if they'll attempt to work any of its cues or themes into the new music? Really I just want to hear Thom Yorke scream, "Witch! Witch! Witch!" is all I want, people.
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The Meat in a Hunnam Beckham Sandwich

May 10, 2017, 3:11 pm
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Wow they're really leaning into it, aren't they?
(via, thanks Mac)


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Good Morning, World

May 11, 2017, 7:12 am
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I know that Benoît Magimel has has a semi-esteemed career in France but I can't see him without thinking of Isabelle Huppert and The Piano Teacher, so I've decided that this scene of him molesting a man in the shower from a TV series called Marseille is just his Piano Teacher character living his post-Huppert fucked up life.

Nobody's the same once Huppert gets her hands on ya! Anyway does anybody know who the other actor is here? I tried looking through the show's cast list but I got really bored of that after about five seconds. Y'all help.
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Today is Benoît's 43rd birthday so we wish him a happy one, trolling public shower bathrooms or whatever it is he feels like doing. And it's a shame he's not in Haneke / Huppert's upcoming reunion, no? He looks like he could use a Happy End.
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Five Frames From ?

May 11, 2017, 8:01 am
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Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

May 11, 2017, 8:20 am
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... you can learn from:


Aunt Lydia: In the days of evil and anarchy 
you had freedom to, now you are 
granted freedom from. Don't underrate it. 

I haven't seen this version of Margaret Atwood's book since high school at least (and that was a long time ago, my friends) but my recollection of it is it wasn't great - it's being screened here in NYC at The Quad this Sunday and Monday as part of their series on the film's composer and I'm contemplating going to give it another look-see, what with the current Hulu series kicking all kinds of ass. Have any of you seen the 1990 film lately? Today would have been the 54th birthday of its star Natasha Richardson if she hadn't died far far too young in 2009.


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Consider Me Beguiled

May 11, 2017, 8:34 am
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I am bewitched and bewildered by the peachy pink beauty of the poster for Sofia Coppola's The Beguiled! In case you missed the trailer click here. With this and My Cousin Rachel both hitting this Summer it's gonna be a sweaty girly time at the multiplex this season. And speaking of Kirsten Dunst on awesome posters...

... I hadn't heard squat about Woodshock until this poster and the trailer popped up earlier this week but it looks like A24 owns all of our asses now, lock stock and butt-cheeks. I am fine with that. You are fine with that. We are all fine with that. Here's the trailer:
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Don't Tell Mom the Kidnapper's Dead

May 11, 2017, 9:25 am
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Go back and look at the reviews for the the Bette Midler & Shelley Long buddy comedy Outrageous Fortune in 1987. Not good. Roger Ebert said, "This is a movie that has its commercial concept written all over it; it's so painstakingly crafted as a product that the messy spontaneity of life is rarely allowed to interrupt." Or go back and look at the reviews for the also-starring-Shelley comedy Troop Beverly Hills two years later... not good. Also Ebert: "Nobody within a mile of this project seems to have possessed an ounce of irony."

You know what movies I've watched a million times from the 80s? Outrageous Fortune and Troop Beverly Hills. And it seems pretty clear that the folks who made Snatched, the new Amy Schumer action-comedy with Goldie Hawn playing Amy's mom, have watched the fuck out of those movies too. (You should add in a heaping extra helping of Romancing the Stone while we're at it.) 

I'm not making the case that "critics suck and you shouldn't listen to them" here. I mean, obviously. I am writing a review myself. I just think it's nice to think of the little girls and gay boys of today, and their whatever gendered like-minded kin, having their own Outrageous Fortunes -- these movies are dumb and broad and sappy as hell, but they're OUR dumb and broad and sappy as hell, and the multiplex is so exhaustingly self-serious with superhero robot apocalypse cock contests if I wanna sneak into the other theater to laugh at a reaction shot from a kitty cat once in awhile I should goddamned well be able to do that shit.

So no, Snatched isn't going to change the world. I'm sorry to tell you that. Go watch the 20th Pirates of the Caribbean or Transformers movies to get your dick good and sucked. But Snatched does have a couple of scenes that made me double over with laughter, it's got a hot guy to ogle, and there's a sweetness and a a comradery between Schumer & Hawn, two goofy golden gals, that's refreshing and still far far too rare on-screen. (Plus Wanda Sykes! And Joan Cusack! And Joan Cusack parkour sight-gags!) It's a light ninety minutes of goofy golden fun. And you can bet if this thing's on TV in the future me and my like-minded brethren will stop the channel and get caught up in its goofy golden ass all over again.
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Géza Röhrig Three Times

May 11, 2017, 10:11 am
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A happy 50th birthday to the Son of Saul actor Géza Röhrig -- I know he's also a poet and a kindergarten teacher (!!!) so he's got other things to fill his life with but I wish he'd do more acting work; I found him strongly compelling on-screen. He hasn't got anything else lined up according to IMDb! (click to embiggen pics)


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I Heart Queers

May 11, 2017, 10:24 am
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Don't you heart queers? And some of our most favorite queers are getting together to make a series of short 15-minute monologue films for the BBC called, you guessed it, Queers, to mark the 50th anniversary of the "Sexual Offenses Act of 1967," which "partially decriminalized sex between men," as Variety puts it. For more specifics on the law click here. But to think dirty thoughts about the actors they've lined up for this thing, stay put! MNPP faves pictured above Russell Tovey and Ben Whishaw will both participate...

... that's a picture of Ben in his segment, which is called "The Man on the Platform" and will be about a soldier returning from WWI. The series will, and I quote, "explore some of the most poignant, funny, tragic and riotous moments of British gay history and the personal rites of passage of British gay men through the last 100 years." Mkay. Among others the series will also star Alan Cumming and Kadiff Kirwan and Fionn Whitehead; Whitehead can also be seen in Christopher Nolan's upcoming film Dunkirk...


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Pics of the Day

May 11, 2017, 11:50 am
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The lucky folks at Collider got to visit the set of Xavier Dolan's next film The Death and Life of John F. Donovan (read our previous posts here) and came back with a shit-ton of pictures and a brief report (with more to come later) - today's for the pictures though, and as I said, a shit-ton.

I grabbed the three that boast Kit Harington because obviously but if you click over you can see images of Kathy Bates and Susan Sarandon and Natalie Portman and Jacob Tremblay and more of Dolan himself and Jessica Chastain. Fun tidbit: Dolan shot this movie on 65mm! Wowza.


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Gay Gods & Season Two!

May 11, 2017, 12:47 pm
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While I prepare my entire body by lathering it for the next several days in lotions and oils to really get everything I can out of this Sunday's new episode of American Gods which features, according to people in the know, "the hottest and most pornographic gay sex scene" ever put on television between the two lovely gentlemen you see above (on the left that's Omid Abtahi, who we've posted several pictures of in the past, and the right that's Mousa Kraish rocking a seriously fine full beard) some other seriously thrilling news has presented itself -- the show just got renewed for a second season! Deadline says it will be at least eight more episodes, the same as what the first season runs. Huzzah!
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Good Morning, World

May 12, 2017, 6:52 am
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A happy 38 to the actor Aaron Yoo today -- off the top of my head without digging too deeply into it I think Aaron might be the only actor who has been killed by both Freddy Krueger and Jason Voorhees. (Edited to add: Yup it's true, although you can't count the Freddy vs Jason movie, I think. You have to say "in their own respective movies.") In the 2009 remake of Friday the 13th he played Chewie the stoner who gets a screwdriver thru his throat...

... and in the 2010 remake of A Nightmare on Elm Street (co-starring Carol's own Miss Rooney Mara!) Aaron played a kid named Marcus who gives Rooney a vital little bit of info she needs over the internet only to immediately have his face bashed into his computer screen. Seriously though - dude's gonna be able to travel to horror-cons for the rest of his life on those stats. Anyway these pictures here are from the television series The Tomorrow People, which... well I have no idea what that was.


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Five Frames From ?

May 12, 2017, 7:18 am
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Everything You Ever Need To Know About Life...

May 12, 2017, 8:02 am
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... you can learn from:


Patient: Y'know, I know there are 
people who are normal. 
Dr. Ford: Are there? 
Patient: Yes, there are. But... 
Dr. Ford: But what? 
Patient: But I don't know what those people do. 

I feel like people don't talk about what a great movie House of Games is often enough. For that matter people don't talk about what a great actress Lindsay Crouse is nearly often enough either. She's turning 69 years old today and she is woefully under-used and underappreciated, don't you think? I see via her IMDb that she's been doing the Law & Order thing for the past few years? Well it's good she's working but somebody needs to give her a prime fucking part. How could you not want to write for Lindsay Crouse? What a privilege that would be. She comes off so terrifically steely and hard-edged and smart.

At least Joss Whedon was smart enough to use her -- I was going to say he was also dumb enough to kill her character off and replace her with Adam (ugh Adam) but apparently I have just learned that Crouse wanted out of her Buffy contract at the last minute and Adam was a fill-in for whatever they had planned. Huh. I take back bad thoughts, Joss!
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